/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>18361604
>I hate niggers, roasties, kikes, and most especially jannies. FUCK JANNIES.

>>18361604
my father raped me when i was 11 years old and i enjoyed it a lot

>>18361604
"I'm interested in working here." I don't know how you millennials have put up with this shit for a decade... all prior generation's applicants would have redirected the interview to the actual job or walked out.

>>18361604
>What's the best answer to the interview question "Tell me something about yourself"?
I enjoy sitting in room with a bunch of dorks who ask dumb questions.

>>18361604
well im a really big cuck. i like to see white women such as yourselves getting wildly fucked with huge nigger cocks. and i can tell you from years of watching cuck porn that all of you lovely ladies are built for bbc.

so when can i start?

>>18361620
You're hired.

>>18361604
"I'm gay and i don't hold chainlink anymore, sergey betrayed us all, who's that bitch? Traps are gay men wearing wigs, landlords are the new jannies"
>then i fart loudly

>>18361604
> "Tell me something about yourself"?
I'm fucking you son.

>>18361604
There is an idea of a me. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. Only an entity. Something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.

>>18361604
I like dogs :)

>>18361604
I create value

>>18361604
They call me thre-leggy McKormick

>>18361640
Continue. Paint me a picture

>>18361604
"i bought LINK at $0.30"

>>18361604
>No you.

Are you looking for a friend or an employee?

>>18361604
I hold 10k worth of linkies and hold boomer stocks.

ask them which self and if they enquire more tell them to talk to your lawyer about discriminating against schizophrenics

>>18361620
Hello, based department?

im an overachiever

>>18361604
"no"

>>18361604
I'm Jewish

>>18363092
Shalom, you're hired

What's your greatest weakness?

What is this? A fucking Rorschach test? The common interviewer who follows these cookie cutter interrogations wouldn't even know how to interpret what you tell them meaningfully. If you just side step and talk about last night's game or the new Netflix show, they'd probably give you a job if you fit their social clique.

>>18361650
Kek, it’s pathetic. You show up and do the job, it doesn’t have to be more complicated than that

>>18362907
Y-you t-too!

>>18361604
Anything with the words:conscientious, team ,accountable, learn, progress, inclusive, growth,

>>18361604
I enjoy making extremely low-effort posts on an Iranian goat training bulletin board.

I hate niggers

>>18361604
I had a job interview yesterday that went quite well, and this was the first thing they asked me. I just told them where i currently work, what i do there, where i studied and where I grew up. When you talk about where you work try and make things relevant to the job yoh are applying for. You can also talk about hobbies and previous employment.

>Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.