/biz/ - Business & Finance

Dividends are your frens

Is this priced in?

>China lying about their numbers
>Trump is still on "it's just a flu bro" tour
>Spain and Italy are kill

But


IT

IS

ALL

PRICED IN

i love her bros >>18153532

>He boot zee bool trap?
>Lundi, DOOMP EET.

US deaths will begin to skyrocket next week. Its fucking over

>>18153532
Bless her heart in thinking that not growing since 10 is a bad thing

>>18153546
yes boog

>>18153532
My dream girl

tell me something you've never told anyone else bros

>>18153532
Stupid fucking pedo

>>18153532
>no hook-ups
They always want hook-ups.

Unironically over.

>>18153532
Whoa. What if we created a medical procedure to do this intentionally?

Black Monday confirmed

KEK

>>18153532
Which stocks to hold to get her??

>>18153589
Faggot

>>18153578
When I am at home I sometimes scream loudly even though I am not autistic.

>>18153596
FBI! This is the one!

>>18153594

https://youtu.be/acJ6qw0k6FA
Comfy weekend befor despair

>>18153592
They mean no hookups if you aren't chad.

If you are using robinhood, how can you ensure a stock you hold is sold as fast as possible on Monday open, or even sooner than that? Asking for a friend.

>>18153532
pituitary tumors increase your growth hormones not remove them

>>18153602
what sort of activities is this clothing supposed to be used for?

>>18153596
Can she have children safely? I would insist on a c section when the time came. Why risk the damage

>>18153532
Bros I think I'm unironically a pedo at this point. Years of 4chan and doujiins have warped my mind.

I just want to fuck a little girl.

>>18153532
If 40 years she will be like those ESPer kids from Akira.

Spain closes all the non essential activities

https://spidr.today/?c=es

>>18153656
Erotic stock trading

>>18153532
jesus christ almighty, our lord and savior

>>18153612
>>18153615
what the fuck is with all the newfags? i thought the leddit invasion was a myth

>>18153679
what sorts of stocks does that involve

>>18153578
I'm very insecure about everything about me

>>18153645
woah we got a pituitary tumor expert in here lmao yo where ur PHD from bro??

>>18153661
>Can she have children safely?
Only one way to find out...

>>18153683
>i thought the leddit invasion was a myth
oh it's very real

>>18153532

https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/trans-surgeries-postponed-indefinitely-amid-coronavirus-pandemic-n1167756
Are the rate of tranny suicides from lack of hormones priced in?

>>18153532

>>18153594
Fake and gay

>>18153693
GUSH

>>18153683
We've been here for years you fucktard. And every time it's the same joke. >>>/pol/
Off you go.

>>18153698
He graduated from anecdotal evidence academy top of his class. He knows basically everything that he knows.

>>18153705
priced in from the start

>>18153683
It happened to most major boards. At 100% invasion displacement, you get /v/ and /pol/.

>>18153714
Real and fucked up.
https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/28/politics/trump-new-york-new-jersey-quarantine-coronavirus/index.html
First such link. I can literally find 17 other links if you wish to be a colossal faggot about which source gets used to say the same damn thing.

>>18153705
Everything is priced in.

Instead of SQQQ and friends, should I just swing trade UVXY, knowing that volatility will always go back up during 2020 because this is a silly year?

>>18153705
Very bullish imho.

>>18153642
My friend says he needs answers now or he is going to delete the master copy of toy story 5 and crash DIS.

>>18153758
not overnight

>>18153746
>orange man capitulates
Hail Corona-chan

>>18153774
>delete the master copy of toy story 5
good, the 4th one was sjw trash

>>18153714
It's unironically real and Trump announcing it in advance and saying "eh maybe" is one of those 12D-Chess moves none of us can really understand. The coronavirus has really met it's match in daddy Trump。

I think I’m ready to be hurt again.

>>18153642
Its called pressing the sell button

>>18153642
Enter a limit order with a low price for Monday. Assuming Robinhood even offers that capability lmao.

>>18153758
Look at the uvxy chart and zoom out.
Report back when you did so.

>>18153758
TA does not apply to the vix so you're giving up that small advantage.

>>18153718
>we
Can you just fuck off you brainless sheep? You just come here and repeat the same shit on reddit then get mad when people aren't banned for have a real opinion.
>ORANGE ME BAD THO!!!
>MUH POL BOOGGIEMAN!!!
>RACISM IS NOT COOL BRO!!!
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

>>18153798
I did this once with the buy button and my order wasn't filled.

Where can i start getting more into stock market trading and a career in that field? (or finance), i spent all my time studying philosophy and arts but i want to get into stuff like this.

>>18153774
>>18153791
What, they made four of those things?

>>18153812
>Can you just fuck off you brainless sheep? You just come here and repeat the same shit on /pol/ then get mad when people aren't banned for have a real opinion.

>>18153817
then your shitstock was illiquid

>>18153834
investopedia

>yfw Coronachan was a Communist plot all along

>>18153817
They only fill you if it advantages the market makers.

>>18153656
Don’t be stupid.
That’s a battleship.

>RIYADH OIL FACILITIES UNDER MISSILE ATTACK

>RIYADH OIL FACILITIES UNDER MISSILE ATTACK


>RIYADH OIL FACILITIES UNDER MISSILE ATTACK


>RIYADH OIL FACILITIES UNDER MISSILE ATTACK


>RIYADH OIL FACILITIES UNDER MISSILE ATTACK

>>18153845
Truthful opinions are banned on reddit. Probably why you're having such a hard time understanding.

>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
>ح˚௰˚づ
>ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?
ح˚௰˚づ
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU OKAY MUMU?

>>18153888
Priced in before it even happened.

>>18153532
Also that's a Russian child model who is actually underage, you can discover this with 30 seconds of Googling. MOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

>>18153852
It was BA. Put the buy order in after market the day before and they cancelled it end of market hours the next day.

>>18153894
Would you fuck off already

Why did WY never recover after the 2008 crash?

>The granddaddy forestry company
>Weyerhaeuser is not only a behemoth in the forestry sector, but it's one of the largest REITs in the country. The company has unmatched scale since it owns 13 million acres of timberlands across the U.S., which makes it one of the world's largest private timberland owners. That said, Weyerhaeuser is a diversified forestry company because it's also the leading wood products producer in North America. Meanwhile, the company has a healthy balance sheet, complete with an investment-grade credit rating and solid leverage metrics, including a net debt-to-enterprise value of 21% and 3.5 times net debt-to-adjusted EBITDA. Those characteristics make it an excellent option for investors seeking a forestry company to be a core long-term holding in their portfolio.

>>18153915
can you fuck off this website

>>18153854
Source: Dude trust me.

>>18153888
Is US going to attack Iraq and Iran now with the coronavirus going on? 2020 is fucking based.

>>18153919
I have slowly come to the terrible revelation that none of you know what the fuck you are doing. I have a Master's in Accountancy with a minor in Finance. I work for a fortune 100 as a corporate accountant with a CMA and CPA. I used to have some faith in anon.
None of you know how to actually value a company. You can't read financial statements. For fuck's sake you think TA works and the entire field of decision science churns out dissertations every other day highlighting their absolute dismay at the fact that brainlets ever consider using it. You have no idea what Dunning-Kruger is. You don't know what survivorship bias is. You are fucked.

>>18153682
Put the candy down Pepe

>>18153797
let us know what happens with that UWT. i'm curious what the payout for it will be.

>>18153929

>>18153888
>intercepted
BOOOOO try again valiant Yemenese, blow up those oil refineries

>>18153603
Of course not. He's got that Spring Break cash, and cash is King.

Just wait until half his state dies, and he gets to pick up all the estate sale property for pennies the dollar at record low interest rates.

>>18153888
Saudi press thinks it may be the Yemeni Houthis.
https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2020/03/rockets-intercepted-saudi-capital-riyadh-jazan-report-200328212702883.html

>>18153683
Have you never used 4chan when school lets out for the summer?
Very similar.

Also the money printer meme got so big that it has a /gif/ thread and an article on know your meme

>>18153918
now youre just blatantly lying or didnt check the spread, or check the afterhours box

Is next week going to be another red week?

>>18153975
Yes.

>>18153975
Were just getting started

>>18153940
Those are my viewing; I’m debating what to lose money in.

>>18153967
Houthis don't miss

>>18153975
blood red
>pic related knows

Some retard let me bought my NCLH 13.5 puts back at .05 after the halt lifted
Just want to say thanks if you're here.

>>18153971

>>18154002
They, if it was them, didn't miss. The missiles were intercepted.

>>18153888
>RIYADH OIL FACILITIES UNDER MISSILE ATTACK

I hope Trump says "Oh, you want help after you fucked us on oil? Sorry, we're busy, shitheads" when the deathcultists wipe the shit off their robes and start screaming at the world to help them.

>>18153532
Holy shit

>>18154002
god samus is the only non3d girl id fuck

>>18153603
conceptualize the scent

>>18153975
It’s another priced in week

>>18153578
I got my dick sucked by a guy once, he touched me while I was pretending to be asleep

Well my state just got FEMA'ed so federal bucks is on the way to help stem the tide of the virus infections. Just 8 people have died but we have almost 400 cases (and growing). I'll be fucking happy when my 2400 bucks gets dumped into my account.

>>18154005
NO WAY

>>18153853
Do they have legit online classes on there or is it all just browsing? Where should i start economy or stocks?

>>18154016
You're talking to automated responses. Sorry anon

>>18153532
she wasn't white like this chick but I dated a filipina girl who was 4'7 85 lbs. and looked like she was 12...shit was cash yo.

>>18153578
I live at home for free even though I sit on ~$850k

THREAD THEME
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEMCYBPUR00

>>18153532
So technically her pussy is cunny....even though her body has aged?

>>18154005
>>18154049
>no one even updating his Wikipedia page
Why should I care about some nobody

>>18153928
is wood the future?
is the future wood?

>>18154066
I know. I was hoping they would give me the reason they didn't fill the order, as it's all computerized and the computer definitely knows. They don't want the computer to tell me though.

>>18154016
thats pretty unusual, did you check the Afterhours box?

>>18154016

>>18153915
You just don’t get it. Do you?

>>18154071
dude how

>>18154026
Hmm yes mighty pungent my dear, just a little puff for me? *sharts* ohhohohohoh yes m'lady very good, oh yes yes yes indeed

>>18153970
>My OC is now immortalized and in widespread use
Feels good man

>>18154016
If there are no buyers your option defaults back to you.
/biz/

>>18154090
In case you don't know my reply is also selected from list of pre-written replies. The emoji is cute though makes me seem more human.

>>18153915
Since you image searched her. Could you post moar of what you found?

>>18153662
If youre into 12 to 14 year olds you are just a healthy male. Stop falling for anglo propaganda. There is nothing wrong with liking girls who have already hit puberty.

How long until he finds his way here?

>>18154073
I like it

>>18153933
If poor people buy a companies product or kill each other for it then it will make lots of money. All you need to know.

>>18154132
Never
He'll be fapping to Elsa SFMs in no time

>>18154091
I don't remember. Maybe not. I will check it when I put in my sell order then because I am not holding anything going into Monday. I'm done with stocks for a few months.

>>18153888
So putin asked his rebels to poomp Riyadh with missiles?

>>18153603

>>18153888
Who cares. Gas is cheap right now. Fight on brave rebels

Which ETFs are going to outperform the next few years?

Thoughts on Disney as a long term hold?

>>18154165
Boomer remover at work

b u l l i s h

>>18154184
UVXY

>>18154185
How long exactly do you plan to hold?

>>18154002
Field expedient bowel movements

>>18154162
We'll see if this was a sincere attempted strike or a shot across the bow annoyance soon. If they really mean it there will be a lot more coming.

>>18154198
5-10 years

>>18153613
>hyakmimaru content
FUCKKIN SAVVVVED

I didn’t “get” to watch this one with /a/ but I’ve been a huge fan since the PS2 game and ate up a lot of Tezuka manga after reading dororo. Very based.

This is my waifu. I am a man who appreciates fine jugs. Say something nice about her.

>>18154005
>Hessen
Holy cats, that's my state. How come I didnt hear about this?

>>18154103
>My OC is now immortalized and in widespread use
It was quality work so of course. Im hoping whoever made this webm updates it with more headlines over the next couple months.

>>18153933
Good luck outperforming algos using the same data points. Sentiment matters. Qualitative metrics matter. Hype moves markets. Tech sector has proven how much market cap can grow without being remotely profitable.

>>18154194
It could be said that to not remove them would be racist

AAAAAAAA
I MISSED MY CHANCE TO BUY BACK INTO LMT AND CVX

JDST or JNUG?

>>18153933
Shit copy pasta, try again

>>18154240
Nice jug but Jorogumo is best waifu(spider).

Green monday incoming, bullbros.

>>18153578
Hebludibuber, espifetsey etsie bob teetie $

>>18154100
Made $45k on BTC, transfered the money to a brokerage account and made a shit ton during the bull run where stocks simply just went up. Never told my mom about it and she thinks I'm just sitting here playing games all day, kind of sad I guess

I went all in on calls Friday at the close. Am I gonna make it?

so... based on the OP, playing the stock market is just the risk management game?

>>18154373
you will either make it or suffer a major loss. same for me, but with puts.

Anyone collecting comfy dividends that equal the stimulus check you may or may not get?

>>18154373
For what, specifically?

>>18154373
the sudden sell-off on Friday looks pretty bad and implies further red on Monday. i hope you don't take a loss, but that's just my analysis. there's really no good news to fuel a green opening on monday.
screencap this

>>18154373
If you make it, realize your gains at the moment you are green. Do not be greedy.

>>18154411
Green Day’s are filed by bad news, the worse it gets the more Jerome intervenes

>>18154123
Where can I find pics of 12 to 14 year old girls? They dont have to be nude just suggestive

>some guy in chapo trap house has coronavirus
priced in?

>>18154366
so i guess you bought calls over and over after the bitcoin stuff?

>>18154427
bro this is /smg/
we are trying to talk about the stock market

>>18154427
/tv/

>>18154456
Unfortunately yes, that board is specially dangerous at night.

>>18154427
No idea, I used to coom this stuff a lot when I was a teen, but now as a 25 year old my preferences are slowly moving on. Even 19 year olds look like lolis to me now. There are several blogs and chans on the clearnet with the content you want, but I'm not going to fucking link them. If horny 14 year old me could find them, so can you.

>>18154427
Yandex.ru search for child models. Turn off safe search

>>18154427
r*ddit may have what you need

>>18154471
Dammit, same here. One of these days I was at the local SAT equivalent and all end-of-high-school aged persons looked like children.

>>18154069
she probably was 12 dude

>>18154322
Bro, you just posted cringe. This pasta is from before /biz/ even existed.

So many pedos you all make me sick

What are futures looking like right now? (Or is trading not open IDK how it works)

>>18154446
Yeah, until late 2018 when I went over to futures

holy shit i lost a grand on expired options this week. i have no idea what i'm doing

>all these pedos
neck yourselves faggots

>>18154560
The real futures market opens Sunday at 6pm eastern time. In the meantime, here's a CFD site that trades the dow and can be a guidepost for what to expect
https://www.ig.com/en/indices/markets-indices/weekend-wall-street

>>18154568
A 21 year old man wanting to fuck a 13 year old is perfectly health

>>18154474

>>18154560
https://www.investing.com/indices/indices-futures

look at this website tomorrow evening you fucking Nigger.

>>18154565
My deep OTM options all expire in june. Im totally new to this stuff, why buy FDs?

We are going to hit 700k TODAY!
>Bullish
>Priced in

>500 americans dead so far and the day isn't over
How bullish is this?

>>18154568
>not thinking post-puberty prime women are hot just because it's illegal to have sex with them
What a cuck.

>>18154009
Get the vibe someone sincerely believed that was the price they cost

You pedo motherfuckers need Jesus

>>18154598
super bullish, 500 vents are now freed up

>>18154616
But he's too old.

>>18154005
I wonder what kind of dirt he had on the Clintons.

>>18154604
Well murder probably feels good yet is illegal but on the other hand you'd probably be king of your cellblock if you got sentenced for killing pedos.

>GERMAN STATE FINANCE MINISTER COMMITS SUICDE
GERMAN STATE FINANCE MINISTER COMMITS SUICDE
>GERMAN STATE FINANCE MINISTER COMMITS SUICDE
GERMAN STATE FINANCE MINISTER COMMITS SUICDE
>GERMAN STATE FINANCE MINISTER COMMITS SUICDE
GERMAN STATE FINANCE MINISTER COMMITS SUICDE

>German finance minister kills himself. "According to reports, Schäfer is said to have spoken about
a 'hopeless situation for Germanys future', which he saw socially, but also in relation to the economic situation of the country due to the Coronavirus.

HOLY FUUUUCK!!!!!!

https://dw.com/en/german-state-finance-minister-thomas-sch%25C3%25A4fer-found-dead/a-52948976

>>18154278
Jnug.

Gold is gonna fly high shortly.

>>18154616
I wonder what kind of dirt Jesus had on the Clintons.

>>18153645
>>18153645
kek

>>18154616
there are so many blatant nonces here because there's absolutely no moderation on /biz/

post a picture of some tits and it'll stay up all fucking night

>>18154641
>boomer offs himself because boomer's are going to lose their money
bullish and priced in

>>18154643
JNUG is gold miners buddy. The peons can't toil away in the mines if they have the black lung AND coronavirus.

>>18154640
Anon we watch and enjoy violence on TV all the time. That doesn't mean we go out an murder people or assault them.
Again, Imagine not thinking post-puberty young women are attractive.

>>18154670
>>18154641
Yeah boomers killing themselves is pretty much priced in. Theyre losing their 401ks and also can die to corona. They know there is no hope for them. Market priced that in already.

>>18153834
Take an Investments course at a community college.

You'll earn that $500 back in a year instead of losing a couple thousand being an idiot

>>18154641
All according to plan

give me a tldr on what and why is gonna happen on monday

>>18154687
I prefer my women at the age when optimism has been replaced by either delusion or panic.

>>18154668
>nooooo not my heckin kyrgyzstani soapmaking forum!!!!!!!

>>18154708
Replace I prefer with the only women who will return your calls.

>>18154698
woooow $500 in a year.

>>18154704
NYSE will explode due to a fluke reaction between residual coronavirus and powerful cologne
DOW will moon to 30k

>DECLARATION OF WAR
>DECLARATION OF WAR
>DECLARATION OF WAR

https://twitter.com/Breaking911/status/1244030734156926976
https://youtu.be/LOFILwsiLCc?t=20

>>18154708
In other words around 30.

>>18154704
Blood

>>18153928
It was being pumped by whales which led to day trading and then the whales bought other stuff after

Check out Party City's share price over time. Funds fucked them up sooooo hard

>>18154568
nah we need to filter more plebians (like yourself) from this website

>>18154075
updated his wiki for you bro

>>18154718
The only calls girls make about you are to the cops because they're underage and you're hitting on them.

>>18154722
>“I don’t think the President is looking to start a lot of wars with a lot of states”

>>18154704
EITHER
big red because by monday america will be approaching 1000 deaths per day, New York might be quarantined by federal troops, oil is still crashing, and generally my world's on fire, how bout yours, that's the way I like it and I never get bored
OR
hey now, youre Jerome Powell, let the ink go, let's print
hey now, you're the Fed chief, get your game on, go print
and all that glitters is fiat
only shooting stars get to see it

>>18154710
kek

>>18154745
Age of consent in Germany is 14, you anglo cuckold.

>>18154722
P-priced in?

>>18154103
>>My OC
Why are the candles so fucking retarded?
They don't make any sense.

>>18154722
oh no drumpf is going to have to face the army of ny coofers and trannies, how will he ever win?

1-3 video game
4-6 movie
7-9 apply for job

>>18154708
i love milfs

>>18154765
I wasn't expecting a civil war in my lifetime. This is extremely bullish and entirely priced in.
>>18154771
7-9 dummy

>>18154722
Holy fuck, get your shit together and keep your citizens inside and we won't have to bubble your dumb asses in. New Yorkers are spreading this shit around the country at an alarming rate.

Everything is priced in so stop worrying,we'll crab around friday levels for a few months then off to new ATH's . Also buy cruise and airlines faggots,normie npc boomers cannot live without their expensive cruise line vactation 2-3 times every damn year while simultaneously wondering how they never have enough money for that porsche they always wanted.

>hes not adding to his shorts

the market is going at least 50% lower

Ok so 2020s wtf of the month for April will be civil war.
Nice.

>>18153532

>see this picture
>my dick gets hard

Is this bullish?

>>18154604
>it's illegal to have sex with them
...in some countries.

>>18154771
>apply for job
Good luck.

>>18154741
oof

>>18154722
A new yorker being overly dramatic? Color me surprised

>>18154787
what the fuck. Just no, lol.

>>18154778
i should, but i also feel like hiring is not top of mind right now for anyone. there's certainly no interviewing going on right now, assuming i even get to that stage

>>18154763
It's good to see Germany has been so accommodating to its refugees.

>>18154266
Can we be frens?

>>18154778
booooooooooo

>>18154783
most retarded post i've ever seen

>>18154719
Read the post.
I said you'll come out 2000 ahead if you actually learn to swim before jumping into the ocean of the stock market

Where can I see updates for corona in the US? I mean numbers and shit.
John Hopkins just updates EOD.

>>18154766
I never said which OC was mine.

>>18154816
You're going to lose your calls like I lost my puts last week. Enjoy the anxiety.

Priced in?

lol

>>18154800
jesus the amount of pedos on this site is disgusting

>>18154852
Everything is priced in, this is the definitive value, can't go up or down, it's like looking at god.

>>18154816
market's gonna tank since most traders assume everything will be over by May at the latest. In reality it's waves of shit until early-mid 2021. Market will hit rock bottom mid may then hit a high end of year once everyone's on board with the recovery plan.

>>18154852
What a douche lmaoooo

>>18154858
This whole virus thing shows just who actually cares about this country and who doesnt.

>world is imploding
>there are people who are bullish

>>18153578
are you a cop?
you have to tell me if you are a cop

>>18154852
the world is literally ran by mental children

>>18154881
ok they are going to tank. but 50 %... come on man.

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool at the Fed
He was looking kind of dumb with his finger and his thumb
In the shape of an "L" on the DOW chart

Well, the plagues start coming and they don't stop coming
Bend all the rules to keep the banks running
Didn't make sense not to print for fun
Your gains gets smart but the dollar gets dumb

So much to do, so much save
So what's wrong with buying the bond funds?
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

Hey, now, you're the Fed Chief, get your ink out, prints made
Hey, now, you're J Powell, get the brrrr on, get paid
And all that glitters is fiat
Only big banks ever get to see it

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older
But the accounting men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the Treasury picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire. How about yours?
That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored

>>18154801
Do private islands have laws? Asking for a friend.

>>18154852
I think this one is gonna need a second verse...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-jtYT5COvU

>>18154852
Wuhan York is spiraling into chaos

the hospitals are overrun and it hasnt even really started there yet

>>18154722
>Liberals: WHY ISN'T TRUMP SHUTTING EVERYTHING DOWN? HES BOTCHED IT!
>Also Liberals: NO TRUMP IS NOT ALLOWED TO SHUT THINGS DOWN THATS ILLEGAL!
Remember. Orange. Man. ALWAYS. Bad!

>>18154881
If the fed doesn't pump monday, we're in for a circuit breaking dump. Maybe even the big one and have to stop for the day

After my puts print this week, I'm pretty sure there's not going to be any easy way to make money anymore. Monday red, Tuesday green bounce, then who knows what the fuck happens. I guess we wait for the next stimulus bill to create a fake bump, but I'm just throwing shit and hoping I can cash out on some IV swings.

>>18154920
yeah probably not 50% but DJIA will probably hit 13,000 for a day before settling around 15000-18000 for a few months and then start rebounding in October.

>>18154927
Epic toast

Someone screen cap

>>18154927
based

>>18154920
>the market cant go back to where it was in 2012

ok

>>18154909
Dr anon
i`m cia

Every other post in this thread
>[Deleted]
Delete my losses Hiroshimoot-chan?

>>18154927

>>18154959
Dow at 14k would be retirement material. Get all the money you can, pour it into high divvy ETFs and SPY and then just let it rain for all eternity.

All the bad news in the world couldn't overcome Jerome's printer last week and you think the infections we all knew was going to happen aren't priced in?

>>18155001
Kek

>>18154927
You have to go back

>>18154771
>7-9 apply for job
Starting to feel the job hunt is pointless. I've been unemployed for months and now it's likely harder to get a job (that isn't low tier) with the increase in competition.

>>18155037
to where? the based department?

>>18155051
Well, if you don't apply you have 0% chance. It's a numbers game, dawg. You have to churn out those apps until you get a bite for an appropriate position if you wanna wage it up.

what's the downside of shorting the vix once it reaches 100-120+?

>>18154005
He knows the bank is going under and it's going to drag the entire planet down with it.
He took the easy way out before the roaming mobs tore him to pieces.

i want to start buying stocks since they're cheaper now.

is robinhood the /smg/ recommended app or is it a reddit app and you guys use something better?

>>18154350
>Jorogumo
based
very sad
best ghoul

Mutsu also pretty based...
And this stupid girl Hyakki almost got to marry!

>>18154722
>https://twitter.com/Breaking911/
jesus what the fuck even is that feed?
just constant FUD alerts?

>>18154745
Literally the only based thing about germany, except possibly beer and prostitution. Met a couple german girls on the train when I was 22, the cute one was 17 and I let them drink the ouzo my buddy and I brought along. I made a joke about being seen as a criminal or something for hanging out with such a young girl and she laughed at me for that.

Or was that the Austrian girl in Switzerland? Damn. I thought I was old and cynical then haha... wow I was just getting started.

>>18154867
>>18154800
looks kinda like tori black, probably capable of carrying a pregnancy to term, and that's all that matters to animals.

Strip away socially imposed boundaries and programming and all we are is animals.

>>18154858
>>18154903
eh... if it was a military general you wouldn't put them at the front lines... you don't want your leadership getting sick or dead.

But most likely they're just selfish pricks if that's even real.

>>18155051
you can be the "bring out your dead" guy with the bell and the cart
if you get a bell and a cart now you'll be way ahead of the competition

>>18154373
I bought a bunch of calls Friday. Tried reversing my own self in regards to trades. Ironic how when I reverse myself I shouldn't have but when I don't reverse myself I should've.

>>18155025
You can pump the market but you can not safe it that way. Even in 2008 they did not go that far. They were still sensible compared to now.

What we see today is the last sad attempt to save the market and even sacrifing the system and the economy for that. I always thought the American economy was a safe haven, but if Fed and treasury become one just to inflate a bubble then I fear for the sustainability of the US economy as a whole. Even long term.

>>18155076
Trump does something stupid like nuking Ireland and the VIX goes to 200 or something ridiculous

you're basically betting that this year won't get crazier, which is a silly bet

>>18155108
can it really get that much crazier though

>>18155084
TD ameritrade

>>18155021
>high divvy ETFs
Yo how dumb is this? Say VOO compared to VYM for example. Are the high yields sustainable or do cuts happen often?

>>18153683
I came here from reddit 13 years ago.

>>18154852
>a few weeks ago said new york will never see a lockdown
>locks new york down
>now saying new york wont be quarantined
I bet you can guess what happens next

>>18155121
Remember who’s president. It’s an election year too.

>>18155121
America's death toll has doubled since Thursday. Wanna see me do it again?

>brrr

>>18155148
>>18155140
ok gonna short it at 140 then with $20k

>>18153888
>>18153932
>>18153955
God I wish. Ill laugh my ass off if the dumb fucking 15x leverage left over weekend actually pays off. You are just setting me up for a failure.

>>18154931

>get a cough and immediately run to the hospital because the media made you terrified of the next Black Death

I hate this fucking country sometimes

>>18155127
It is just lower capital appreciation in exchange for steady income. Personal preference.

>>18155126
any elaboration on why it's the best? why is robinhood talked about so much?

>>18154931
>Wuhan York
please can we go with Flu York instead

>>18155172
Robinhood is dogshit. They actively trade against their users and are facing a huge class action lawsuit.

>>18153797
https://youtu.be/8AHCfZTRGiI

Is oil gonna dip again soon or was last week the time to load up?

>>18155172

TD Ameritrade is free as well and has instant banking access (can go from your bank to buying stock in less than a minute) as well as much better customer support overall. They also have an excellent trading platform called thinkorswim that can do all the option shit you want. It doesn’t go down for days at a time randomly during stock market crashes and adults use it and not Redditors exclusively.

>>18155191
got it. so TD ameritrade is what most of /smg/ uses?

I have 130k to put in the market right now. Gonna be DCAing of course but what do you think the timeline of my deposits should be? 5k a week? 10K?

>>18155172
Robinhood has had notorious service outages that cost a lot of people money. It was good when it was the only free trading platform but now it’s pretty garbo since everyone offers that.

>>18155136
New York will never instantaneously replaced with a race of lonely catgirls looking for human companionship.

>>18153578
my brother raped me from ages 5-6

>>18155198
Oil is dead.

>>18155198
No one knows for sure, but theyre still pretty cheap now

>>18155239
Them free options though

deaths the day before - > deaths this day
Louisiana 36->18
Florida 17->10
Arizona 5 -> 2

>>18154952
This just means opec tactics to smoke out the US shale oil are working. Thus, oil will continue to plummet.

>>18155276
>>18155276
>>18155276
new

>>18155198
Iv heard theories about supply dying out and since its so hard to restart again the price will eventually rocket after world gets switched on. Even with the price war its hard to see it not rising after wells shutter and factories turn back on

>>18155264
lol are you the seasonal anon?

>>18155246
wait why not

>>18154867
She's 20 you fucking eunuch of a garden gnome

>>18154867
now realize that millions of people every day jerk off to loli and thousands draw new images

>>18154708
25?

>>18155239
Except in Canada, even the fucking Canadian companies offer free trading to Americans BUT NOT CANADIANS

FUCK YOU TD

On an unrelated note, does anyone have preferences as to what the best Canadian dividend ETF would be? My strategy is to invest in USD on speculative and growth stocks, and keep my dividend stocks on the TSX to avoid double tax

>>18155237
deposit 50k, funds take some tie to clear, you don't want to miss any buy opportunities

>>18155309
She has the body of a 11 year old girl dude are you fucking retarded

>>18155253
Whats gonna replace oil efficiency nothing. Oil is king till 2070 the earliest.

>>18155127
Its more up to you really. Usually VOO and VYM do not differ too much.
One would pay out a passive income and the other retains the value and the assets increase faster.

High yields are sustainable in good times but 2008 they went down a lot for a short time but grew in every year since 2009 I think.

Also some countries give lower taxes on divvies.

Both are great long term choices at the bottom.
I love monthly/quarterly pay outs so I would go with the divvies. Take half and invest half of it back.

>>18153578
my wife used to be a prostitute and it turns me on

>>18155362
I believe you can take them out of the shit, but never take the shit out of them.
What do I know, though?

>>18155414
If you put shit on your dick you can put the shit inside them though.

>>18154505

Fuck all you virgin pederast faggots

>>18154931
New Wuhan, missed opportunity

>>18154927
Well done. Shocking how much of the actual song fits unaltered.

Suppose covid was a manufactured event (for argument's sake). How would the powers that be profit from it?

>>18153530
I only have 3k in the market, can't wait a year to turn 3k into 3200 dollars. If I already had 100k I'd throw it at some safe DivveyDivs and forget about it.