/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>13033049
Based and crabpilled

>>13033049
I like how he’s foaming at the mouth with retardation

>>13033049
As btc breaks $4k, great prediction.

>>13033140
They is IQ bubbles

https://youtu.be/GC_mV1IpjWA?t=16s

>>13033049
Whoa, what.

>mfw my tradebot makes a reliable 0.5% daily so long as we keep going sideways

we need more snib memes

>>13033049
JEWS ARE GONE

Crab people, crab people..

>>13033224
>we need more snib memes
Arrgh quit spendin' all me money

So imagine there's this beach side town, and every week there's an animal parade down the boardwalk. There's two groups of animal trainers, and they're rivals. One's from Spain and has a bunch of bulls and caballeros. The other's from Moscow and has bears and cossacks. Only one group can parade on a given week so they're always fighting it out for who gets to show off for all the townspeople. And the people fucking love it, they're putting bets on "Oh, the Cossacks will get it this time", "No, the Caballeros will, the Caballeros will". Cliques are formed of diehard fanatics for each group, who despise the other performance with a passion, raucously cheering and throwing street parties when their favorite trainers get the parade rpute, and breaking into angry ranting and melancholic weeping when they don't. Maybe the entire town's just that autistic, who knows.

Then one day, it's parade time, and the town's out, watching and waiting. And they're standing along the side of the street, hoping to see a bull charging down the road or a hear a bear roaring in the distance, but there's nothing. Everybody's confused. "Where's the parade? There's always a parade..." And then one kid shouts "Look!" and points to the start of the route. And scuttling there, as happy as can be, is a

SINGLE
RUNTY
RETARDED LOOKING
CRAB

Just this tiny fucking crab, with a tiny fucking stupid looking face, scuttling sideways down the boardwalk. Except since it's so retarded, it can't even scuttle in a straight line, it oscillates up and down the path, occasionally stumbling on a knothole or falling down a set of steps. Just the single fucking crab.

And everybody is disappointed, because it sure as fuck ain't as exciting as a bear or bull, so they go home grumbling. "But hey," they think to themselves as they tuck themselves in that night, "at least it should just be this one time. What's the chances of it happening again?"

okay this is epic

>>13033323
great one m8, that actually gave me an idea. how about a squidward/wojak wageslaving behind the register (pic related) with a smug mr.krabs/snib counting his money at a nearby table, with a view behind squidjak through the kitchen window of a brainlet pepe/spongebob happily flipping patties

>>13033417

And the next week, they're out on the boardwalk again, and looking for a bear or bull, except here comes the

FUCKING
WEEDY
UGLY
RETARDED
CRAB
AGAIN

and it does its stupid fucking shuffle down the boardwalk, and the townsfolk are angry. They throw trash at it and boo, "GO HOME CRAB" but the crab doesn't care because it's a crab and even if it wasn't it'd still be too stupid too understand. And this happens the next week, and the week after that, and the week after that.

The townsfolk are devestated by this. Watching this crab is boring as hell compared to the bears or bulls. Some try to make do; they bet on how many times the crab will trip, or if it'll meander too far to one side of the walk. But their hearts just aren't in it anymore.

Months go by. The town dejectedly shuffles to the parade route, expecting nothing but the crab again. Then, in the distance, they hear it.

The sound of hoofs.

A horde of bulls charges in, men dressed like gauchos on their backs cheering and whooping. The crowd is estatic. Even the bear supporters are enthused, because at least it's not that fucking crab again. Kids buy balloons, fireworks go off, ticker tape everywhere. The town goes to sleep that night and has pleasant dreams.

The next week, they go back to the boardwalk, and guess who comes down the street?

THE
FUCKING
RETARD
CRAB

And that's what being on /biz/ during this recent crypto market is like.

>>13033417
>The other's from Moscow and has bears and cossacks.
CHEEKI BREEKI

>>13033417
>One's from Spain and has a bunch of bulls and caballeros
OLE TOMATES

>>13033049
male the picture better

the crab should be moving sideways, not forward

sideways is the whole point...

>>13033490
I fucking love this

>>13033540
>>13033624
Based

oh cause the crab walks sideways? haha I get it

>>13033417
>>13033490
I can't believe you've done this

>>13033634
make*

>>13033417
>>13033490
Absolutely fucking based

>>13033417
>Only one group can parade on a given week so they're always fighting it out for who gets to show off for all the townspeople.

>>13033417
>And the people fucking love it, they're putting bets on "Oh, the Cossacks will get it this time", "No, the Caballeros will, the Caballeros will". Cliques are formed of diehard fanatics for each group, who despise the other performance with a passion, raucously cheering and throwing street parties when their favorite trainers get the parade rpute, and breaking into angry ranting and melancholic weeping when they don't.
>Maybe the entire town's just that autistic, who knows.
Yes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIflfXaQ5f4

>>13033898
My dick got hard reading this post. I wish it was actually like this.

>>13033923
Oh shit I goofed a little.

>>13033417
>>13033490
this is peak story telling right here take notes /biz/

>>13033417
>>13033490
>>13033540
>>13033624
>>13033540
>>13033683
>>13033898
>>13033930
ABSOLUTELY BASED AND REDPILLED

>>13033417
>>13033490
>>13033624
Caballeros means gentlemen. The word you want to use is Toreros

>>13033417
>Then one day, it's parade time, and the town's out, watching and waiting. And they're standing along the side of the street, hoping to see a bull charging down the road or a hear a bear roaring in the distance, but there's nothing. Everybody's confused. "Where's the parade? There's always a parade..." And then one kid shouts "Look!" and points to the start of the route. And scuttling there, as happy as can be, is a
>SINGLE
>RUNTY
>RETARDED LOOKING
>CRAB
>Just this tiny fucking crab, with a tiny fucking stupid looking face, scuttling sideways down the boardwalk. Except since it's so retarded, it can't even scuttle in a straight line, it oscillates up and down the path, occasionally stumbling on a knothole or falling down a set of steps. Just the single fucking crab.
>And everybody is disappointed, because it sure as fuck ain't as exciting as a bear or bull, so they go home grumbling. "But hey," they think to themselves as they tuck themselves in that night, "at least it should just be this one time. What's the chances of it happening again?"

>>13034161
I cant decide which angle looks better.

>>13034179
This one lines In the sand follow the left to right pattern like how we read it’s more natural

>>13034161
have a bump before I go to bed, this is simply epic

sideways crab meme has potential

>>13033634
Like don't have a cow man

>>13034393
Ebin

kekd

>>13033049

Bump for ebin thread

Holy shit /biz/ is so dead

>>13035759
Crypto is ded. Bulltrap confirmed at 200%

>>13033930
>the palm tree is moving together with the cossacks and caballeros

>>13035004
Ebi is japanese for shrimp

>>13035949
Shhhhh

>>13033417
>>13033490

Thank you lad, made my fucking day

>>13033049

The crabs need a bucket.

kek
who makes these

>>13037029
Your mom.

lol nice

>>13037105
cute

>>13034179
This one is the best one

>>13033463
On it.

eating crab is disgusting, they are the ocean's spider. Imagine eating a 2 foot long black widow

>>13037105

>mfw made the screencap

>>13037981
But crabs look spider pies! So tasty!

>>13033049
>>13033417
You two should make this a fuckin weekly session. Definetely this is best thread of the year so far. Fuckin well done anons.

>>13038386
Thanks fren.