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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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10959220 No.10959220 [Reply] [Original]

The right time to buy

>> No.10959241

>>10959220
>The Sun
My shits have more journalistic integrity and fact checking.

>> No.10959523

buy zee dip

>> No.10959628

>>10959241

Exactly. I'm not even sure how someone would behead themselves with a chainsaw. It would probably take more planning than it to be worthwhile... Plus it would suck the wholetime. I don't think the editors have ever used a chainsaw.

> Articles like this scare normies from the crypto.

>> No.10959667

>>10959628
THIS!
Chainsaws are slow as fuck
He would take at least 20 seconds to kill himself
20 seconds of incredibly unbearable pain

>> No.10959682

>>10959628
Maybe he ran it in a small enclosed space until he died from the exhaust.

>> No.10959684

>>10959667
Welcome Will Stewart, our new SciFi article writer.

>> No.10959688

>>10959667
When you believe in something, you'll sacrifice everything to achieve it.

>> No.10959698

This thread is now about theorycrafting how one might behead himself with a chainsaw. Go.

>> No.10959699

>>10959220
source for this hilarious nonsense

>> No.10959715
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10959715

>>10959220

>> No.10959737
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10959737

>> No.10959743

>>10959698
I'm guessing something like a guillotine will be most reliable, where you don't have to do it yourself, but just tug a rope or something to initiate the execution, because you'll clearly fail if you have to do this >>10959715
or cut just enough to fuck up an artery and bleed to death, but that's not certain

>> No.10959751

>>10959698

Okay. Here is how I would do it.

> Be me 15
> Buy Bitcoin. Leave wallet key on death note.
> Put the chainsaw in a vice. So that it doesn't move.
> Ziptie the throttle so that it's running full bore.
> Tie rope with weights on one end around my neck. (Like a bag of cement or something heavy so I don't puss out can't move fast.
> Take a few Huff's of gasoline.
> Cry
> Hold weight in arms and position over now furiously rotating chain.
> Lean over to where neck should fall.
> Drop weight - force neck down.
> Neck is now cut
> Look down is disbelief as head is severed from body
> Realize dad is going to kill me when sees blood all over tool shed.

>> No.10959791

>>10959751
10/10

>> No.10959795
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10959795

he beheaded himself after losing in a game, not bitcoin.
notice how bitcoin is not in the same font in op post retards :(

>> No.10959927

>>10959795
The thread is still valid. Continue theorycrafting.
Anyone /diy/ here?

>> No.10959993
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10959993

>>10959795
>Pavel Mateev

>> No.10960707
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10960707

>>10959927
/diy/ reporting in.
There's horses with attachable chainsaw mounts.
You could spring load the chainsaw or something and just lie on the horse.

>> No.10960740

>not buying the beheader 2000

Mexican technology

>> No.10960749

>>10959715
Lol my sides
>the article author saw this pepe and wrote some bullshit

>> No.10960792

This kid sounds hardcore