/biz/ - Business & Finance

Anonymous Thu Mar 19 10:40:32 2020 No.17937508 [View]
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>>17937403
>Trump holds his press conference
>News seems to be going good, markets rising
>Suddenly Ackman walks up on stage and pushes him away from the microphone
>Announces that he's gotten REM back together
>They perform "It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)" as he starts screaming that the global economy is going to contract by 25% and that he saw visions of the Horsemen with American unemployment topping out at 50%, war with China inevitable
>Markets plunge

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