/biz/ - Business & Finance

>be me
>own multi million dollar company
>want to go sell stocks and shit but wanna make more people buy my stocks and avoid regulations and shit
>sell paintings instead
>Have a underground agreement that a shitty painting is worth X% of my company and increase the value of those paintings as dividends (basically a stock)
>sell these shitty paintings
>company does well; paintings gain value, company does bad ; paintings lose value
>determine this value via a corrupt appraiser
>no capital gains tax because painting
>they can use the paintings as a tax deductible if donated

Which F.B.I/I.R.S black site would I end up in? Would this work?

>BOOM BOOM CRASH

SEC
IRS

EVERYONE ON THE GROUND NOW
HANDS BEHIND YOUR BACK NOW
DONT MOVE!

>doge bork bork

OPEN FIRE!!!!!!

i SOLD

ITS FUCKING OVER

OVER
V
E
R