/biz/ - Business & Finance

>>53028018
>walk into Gamestop
>ask for a drs
>"What?"
>spaghetti slowly drips from my pockets
>oh god not again
>face gets red
>"Please give me a drs share right now."
>"I don't know what that is. What platform is it on?"
>struggling to contain my embarrassment
>clenching asscheeks together to hold in my shit
>meanwhile spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets
>voice reduced to a mumble
>"have money please drd share give money please share"
>"Are you ok?"
>shit breaches through my asscheeks
>propelled forward at 60mph
>crash through the Gamestop employee's counter
>he's holding on to me for dear life
>all the while spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets like fumes
>crash through the entire row of buildings in the strip mall, broken glass shards in my face
>yelling "DRS SHARE PLEASE MONEY DRS GAMESTOP ShARE"
>Gamestop employee is covered in shit and spaghetti
>my pocket rocket shows no signs of stopping
>he tilts me backwards
>the sheer force of my shit has reached 650mph, we are now propelling upwards
>the spaghetti and shit intertwines and falls down to earth in glorious yellow and brown streams as we head towards the stratosphere
>children below frolic in the mess falling from my anus
>the g-force is causing my asscheeks to flap vigorously and create a gale
>spaghetti and shit blowing through the air on the planet below
>3 miles upwards now
>Gamestop employee has died from lack of oxygen, his body falls to the surface below and is shredded by the force of my shit
>my transformation is almost complete
>as I leave the atmosphere my bear hands sprout and my tail grows, acting as a rudder
>steer myself across the cosmos with my gleaming shit and spaghetti trail